Thursday, June 21, 2012

When The Image Doesn't Match

Our brain is tricky.
The devil, trickier.

And he knows how to creep in, plant terrible weedy seeds and sneak out without fanfare or being detected.

Today I completed a competition with the company I am a consultant for. It's wonderful, and it designed to encourage people to keep going and reward those that finish. I started late, 28 pound into my weight loss journey. I lost 30 pounds during the challenge and wrote my essay about the journey and had Aaron take my photos and uploaded them to the computer for entry.

And then....had a total melt down.

I can't see the difference in the photos.

I know I am 2 fat girl sizes down (for those that don't know, fat girl sizes have a greater range in "adaptability" than smaller sizes). I know I am down 30 pounds from those photos! I KNOW it, but I can't SEE it. All I see is a blobby woman with a long way to go.

So what's really going on here?
A lie, that's what.
The enemy planted seedy lies, that sprout when I talk poorly about myself, and block the truth.A big one for me is regarding failing.
It really is that simple.
I sent those photos anyway. I still wanted a chance at the random drawing to win a cruise.
A funny thing happened when I sent them, I could see more clearly that yes in fact various parts of me are smaller. I am not all svelt and trim, yet, but I am smaller. If his plan was to deter me from finishing something, confirming the lie I fight that I am a failure, well, it didn't work this time.


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