My son, who's 7, just walked out of his room, book in hand and announced, "I'm reading Moby Dick". I bit my tongue, not wanting to spoil this book for him. He's read The entire Chronicles of Narnia already. He's delighted in James And The Giant Peach several times. He's been very upset reading any book where an animal, or main character dies, like Bridge to Terabithia (last weeks selection). I'm sorry to all you classics lovers, but I truly disliked Moby Dick. I hope for his sake that he enjoys reading it.
This brings up a very important fact that many people, especially parents , seem to miss. What we say, our opinion about something to be specific, greatly determines if a child will like or dislike something. When my daughters were very young we were visiting their paternal grandparents, who had 2 small yippy dogs. One of these dogs snapped at one of the girls, she of course then didn't want anything to do with the little dogs. I MADE A MISTAKE the very next time we were around dogs again. She shied away and I made the statement, out loud, in front of her , "She's afraid of dogs because one nipped her fingers". This statement was made regularly, and within a short time my girls became completely afraid of dogs, when they never used to be. At some point I wised up and changed my behavior, and lo and behold they became unfrightened of animals again. If I had immediately answered Spencer with, "Oh, I hated that book" I would have jaded his view, and possibly ruined what might be an enjoyable book to him.
Even claiming things that seem true can harm your child. "He's always been like that" Can lead to that child never trying to be any different.
"It's a family trait" , okay, it might be, but who isn't to say you can't stop that trait before the next generation?
Your words even against yourself are incredibly powerful. If you are always saying you can't, or I never..as in " I can't stick to a diet plan", "I am never on time" , "I can't get organized", then guess what? You most likely will fulfill your spoken self prophecy...change your view, change your words, change your life.
Start with one that many women have a lot of trouble with...
"I am beautiful, I am worthy, God loves me deeply".
Try saying that to yourself everyday for a month.
I will visit this topic again.